Chapter 110: Negative

I hate the feeling of being stuck in this bubble of confusion and worry. I know it's too early. I know I'm probably overthinking the dull ache in my abdomen and the pain in my back and the fact that my period hasn't arrived yet and it's approximately forty five days to my thirtieth birthday. Jesus Christ, I'm getting old. Saying it makes it even scarier. I'm not naive. And neither am I a kid. I know what the symptoms of pregnancy are. I've secretly done my research. And it's possible that I'm expecting. Am I prepared? No. Am I scared? Yes. Do I want it? Fuck yes. But I also bear in mind that it might be negative and I might actually be coming down with something more life threatening than an unplanned pregnancy. Goodness gracious! My nerves are going to kill me. The clinic was everything Roman’s world wasn’t. Sterile, and quiet. Just muted walls, the faint hum of fluorescent lights, the smell of antiseptic and lemon. I signed in at the reception desk with shaking fingers and sat down,